Friday, February 05, 2010

If Jack Bauer Was My Pastor

Stephen Altrogge:
The other day I was thinking, what if Jack Bauer became a Christian, and then suddenly felt a call to ministry?

What would his church be like? His counseling sessions? Here’s what I think it would be like…
* Counseling sessions would be fast. Really fast. Because he only has two minutes, and you better tell him what’s going on or he’s going to mash your knee with his oversized Bible.

* He would scream the word “now” a lot. As in, “Tell me why you were impatient with your wife. NOW!”

* Every counseling session would end with a confession, because Pastor Jack can pull a confession out of anybody. Even if you didn’t do it.

* In every elders meeting Jack would inform the elders that “he did what he had to”.
Read the rest.

No comments: