John Piper on Male Headship

But what the apostle stresses here in Ephesians 5:25-33 is that husbands should be filled with the Holy Spirit, eager to exalt Jesus Christ and therefore ready to conform their leadership to Christ's. Christ fulfilled his headship or leadership over the disciples through sacrificial service. Jesus did not cease to be the leader of the disciples when he stooped to wash their feet (John 13:13-15). And when he hung on the cross, the weakest of the weak for the sake of his bride, the church, he was no less her head. Woe to the husband who thinks that his maleness requires of him a domineering, demanding, attitude toward his wife. This is not the mark of a Christ-like head but a childish bully.