Some Fear is Extremely Healthy, Some is Not

Radical.net:

Bonhoeffer points out that a preacher of the gospel will either be motivated or hindered by fear. The question we must ask is what kind of fear characterizes our everyday lives? Bonhoeffer reflecting on Matthew 10:26-28 writes,

They must not fear men. Men can do them no harm, for the power of men ceases with the death of the body. But they must overcome the fear of death with the fear of God. The danger lies not in the judgement of men, but in the judgement of God, not in the death of the body but in the eternal destruction of body and soul. Those who are still afraid of men have no fear of God, and those who have fear of God have ceased to be afraid of men. All preachers of the gospel will do well to recollect this saying daily.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer, The Cost of Discipleship, 218

Fear and Parenting

Adam Griffin:

When I became a parent I found myself frequently getting drawn into vicious thought cycles of pessimism concerning my son. It would usually start with a simple observation like, “My son doesn’t like naps” or “My son’s hair is thin.” That would lead to a series of fearful and often ridiculous what ifs. 

What if he never sleeps well? What if he goes bald at 15? What if he ends up chronically cranky? What if he resents me and my inferior chromosomes? What if he’s hard to love, he and I don’t get along, and he struggles to make good friends? 

Quickly I’d arrive at the inevitable conclusion: Because my newborn son won’t take a good nap and he’s yet to grow hair, he’ll surely die an old, lonely jerk with severed family relationships.

There’s no shortage of fears in parenting. 

Read the rest.

Do You Know The Most Frequent Command in the Bible?

Ed Welch:

“Do not be afraid.” Would you believe that this is the most frequent command in the Bible? More than three hundred times God commands his people to not be afraid.

There are two ways to hear these commands. One is, “Stop it right now! Don’t be afraid!” In this case fear and worry would be just plain wrong. It would violate God’s direct command. When afraid or anxious you would confess to the Lord that it is sin—and then confess it again and again.

But there is another way to hear this command.

Have you ever heard a parent say to a child, “Be careful”? Technically, it is a command, yet no child would take it that way. The parent is not saying, “Be careful or you will be in trouble,” but, “I love you and my desire is that you be safe.”

Here is what Jesus says to you: “Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom” (Luke 12:32).

This is not an edict from the King. The term “little flock” gives you a window into God’s heart. This is both a plea and an encouraging word from the Father, who knows and loves you. It is exactly what you need because when you are afraid you desperately need someone bigger than yourself in whom you can trust.

13 Reasons Not To Be Afraid

John Piper:

We will not die apart from God’s gracious decree for his children.

James 4:14-15; Matthew 10:29-30; Deuteronomy 32:39

Curses and divination do not hold sway against God’s people.

Numbers 23:23

The plans of terrorists and hostile nations do not succeed apart from our gracious God.

Psalm 33:10; Isaiah 8:9-10

Man cannot harm us beyond God’s gracious will for us.

Psalm 118:6; Psalm 56:11

God promises to protect his own from all that is not finally good for them.

Psalm 91:14

God promises to give us all we need to obey, enjoy, and honor him forever.

Matthew 6:31; Philippians 4:19

God is never taken off guard.

Psalm 121:4

God will be with us, help us, and uphold us in trouble.

Isaiah 41:10, 13

Terrors will come, some of us will die, but not a hair of our heads will perish.

Luke 21:10–11, 18

Nothing befalls God’s own but in its appointed hour.

John 7:30

When God Almighty is your helper, none can harm you beyond what he decrees.

Hebrews 13:6; Romans 8:31

God’s faithfulness is based on the firm value of his name, not the fickle measure of our obedience.

1 Samuel 12:20–22

The Lord, our protector, is great and awesome.

Nehemiah 4:14

Gospel Implications

Jonathan Leeman:

Don't be afraid of people who will make fun of you for being a Christian. Don't be afraid of those who might persecute you. Don't be afraid of losing your job, your family, or your life. Be strong and courageous. God alone is to be feared. Obey him.

Often it's our fear of the world that lies behind our disobedience. We fear what we might lose: our reputation, our money, our job, our safety, our lusts, our ambitions, even our life. So we try to take control of our circumstances and do whatever it takes to hold on to what we want.

Knowing that God is generous and faithful to his promises helps us be strong and courageous because we can trust his character as we pour out our lives for him.

This means that as Christians, we can be generous with our money and time, knowing that God cares for us and will provide for us. Don't worry!

This means we can take the gospel to tough neighborhoods and hostile nations, knowing that God will keep his promises---that his sheep in those neighborhoods and nations will hear his voice and that nothing can separate us from his love. Don't fear!

This means that we can have the courage to be faithful as parents and as spouses, doing what is right in those relationships day after day, even though the results are not always visible.Don't be anxious! Take courage.

Read the rest.


Books by Jonathan Leeman:

• Church Membership: How the World Knows Who Represents Jesus
• The Church and the Surprising Offense of God's Love: Reintroducing the Doctrines of Church Membership and Discipline
• Church Discipline: How the Church Protects the Name of Jesus
• Reverberation: How God's Word Brings Light, Freedom, and Action to His People

"You see, real freedom is not liberty to do what we want or the absence of distress. Real freedom is the deep-seated confidence that no matter what, God really will provide everything we need."

Jon Bloom:

You see, real freedom is not liberty to do what we want or the absence of distress. Real freedom is the deep-seated confidence that no matter what, God really will provide everything we need (Philippians 4:19). The person who believes this is the freest of all persons on earth, because no matter what situation they find themselves in, they have nothing to fear (Philippians 4:11). 

But the only way for sinners like us with a bent toward unbelief in God to find this kind of freedom is by experiencing repeatedly God’s delivering power and his faithfulness. That’s why we are to count it all joy when we meet trials of various kinds (James 1:2). These trials are setting us free. 

God’s word to you through this story, in all the crises you face, is this: “Do not be afraid and do not be dismayed at this great horde, for the battle is not yours but God’s” (2 Chronicles 20:15).

Read the rest.


Recommended Resources:

• When People are Big and God is Small
• Running Scared

Afraid?

Guest post by Darryl Dash

"Fear is a daily battle that everyone in ministry is called to fight," says Paul Tripp. I'm finding this is true in my own ministry, as I wrote about here:

When we're young, we risk a lot because we have to, and because we often have little to lose. The same goes for churches. As we age, we have more to protect, and we start taking less risk. This makes sense to my financial advisor, but it also explains why a lot of people and a lot of churches stop growing.

Fear takes over when we're afraid to do what's required because of the cost, real or perceived. When you look carefully, fear reveals our idols.

If you're like me and find that you struggle with fear, Paul Tripp's article is a great help. His main points:

1. Humbly own your fears.
2. Confess to those places where fear has produced bad decisions and wrong responses.
3. Pay attention to your meditation.
4. Preach the gospel to yourself.

I also appreciated this piece on failure in the Harvard Business Review, if one of your fears is the fear of failing.

The Mark of Wonderful and Powerful Sanctification

Two highly recommended books by Ed Welch:

• When People are Big and God is Small
• Running Scared

They Unlocked The Door

“It is noteworthy [in Acts chapter 2] that the disciples, who appear to have been hiding away from their enemies in the spirit of John 20:19, immediately became different people. They unlocked their door, and went down to the most public place they could find and there preached Jesus boldly. This change from cringing cowards to fearless preachers was permanent. We read of Christians making all sorts of mistakes afterwards, and they are far from being perfect. But we do not again read of them hiding away for fear of men. The Spirit altered all that. From now on they became fearless vehicles of the Spirit in proclaiming to men the message of the gospel.”

 - Leon Morris, Spirit of the Living God p, 53.

(HT: Ray O.)

Why Was Jesus Unintimidated by Pilate?

Great meditation here by John Piper, for those, like me, who wrestle with fear.

Fear

Paul Tripp:

Fear can overwhelm your senses. It can distort your thinking. It can kidnap your desires. It can capture your meditation so that you spend more time worrying about what could be than considering the God who is. Fear can cause you to make bad decisions in the short term and fail to make good decisions in the long run. Fear can cause you to forget what you know and to lose sight of who you are. Fear can make you wish for control you will never have. It can cause you to distrust people you have reason to trust. It can cause you to be demanding rather than serving. It can cause you to run when you should stay and to stay when you really should run. Fear can make God look small and your circumstance loom large. Fear can make you seek from people what you will only get from the Lord. Fear can be the soil of your deepest questions and your biggest doubts. Your heart was wired to fear, because you were designed for life shaped by fear of God. But horizontal fear cannot be allowed to rule your heart, because if it does, it will destroy you and your ministry.

Read the rest.

These Two Paragraphs Could Change Your Life

When my kingdom is at stake - my reputation, my quest for being loved - there is much to lose.  Out of fear I commit myself to self-protection.  Does this sound familiar?  When the things we value are threatened, we protect them.  In this case it is the same as protecting ourselves.  The alternative is to lose my kingdom and be a simple servant of the Most High God.  His kingdom is never threatened because he is all-powerful and he doesn't need anything from us.  He calls us to love and worship him, but he doesn't need it in the sense that we talk about needing love and affirmation.  

This should sound liberating to those who are in bondage to the fear of other people.  When we see ourselves as kings who need affection, we are highly vulnerable.  But as children and servants, we owe a debt of love to others.  We were loved by God more than we loved him; there will always be that imbalance in our relationship.  The only appropriate and healthy response is to treat others the way God has treated us.  The result?  People's (perceived) opinions don't have the same power to crush us anymore.  Instead, we are less concerned about how we are treated and more concerned with how we treat others.  Rejection may still hurt, but it won't control us.  

- Ed Welch, Running Scared, p. 188, 189

The Connection Between Fear and Worry

Do you see the connection with fear and worry? Keep the fear/need connection in mind. Whatever you think you need will control you. If you need something from other people - love, acceptance, approval - they hold the keys to something very valuable to you. You will live in fear that they might not deliver. You will fear those who are the gatekeepers to the fulfillment of your needs.

Why do adults fear a little extra weight? Health is rarely the issue. The real issue is what you will think of me. Why do so many people fear public speaking more than death? The opinions of other human beings are by far the scariest thing on the planet.

- Ed Welch, Running Scared: Fear, Worry & the God of Rest, p. 173, 174

The God of Suspense

The God of suspense is delivering left and right.

For his daily, less noticeable deliverances I want the Spirit to open my eyes so I can be thankful.

For his mighty acts that appear at the eleventh hour, I want grace to trust him.  I want to learn how to express faith in simple obedience amid uncertain situations.

But these after-the-fact deliverances?  I hardly know what to ask.  What if you actually went through your worst nightmare - sexual violation, death of a loved one, divorce?  What then?  Where was the deliverance?  What difference does the after-the-fact deliverance make then?

It means that there will be lots of sorrow as we walk through life, but we aspire to know sorrow that is mingled with hope.  For subjects of King Jesus, death and tragedy are never the last word.  The goodness of our God is certain.  He has given up his very Son for our redemption.  There is no reason to doubt him.  The resurrection punctuates how the last word is one of blessing and joy.   

The resurrection of Jesus issues the surprising command:  don't be afraid.  Because the God who made the world is the God who raised Jesus from the dead and calls you now to follow him.... Believing in this God means believing that it is going to be all right, and this belief is ultimately incompatible with fear.  (source) 

- Ed Welch, Running Scared: Fear, Worry & the God of Rest, p.  91, 92

Adoption and Fear

Russell Moore:

I will never forget seeing her pull the measuring tape out of her purse as she talked about the skull of her child.

The woman, standing in an airport in Russia with my wife and me, was, like us, an American. She, like us, was in the former Soviet Union to pursue adoption. But she was worried. She had heard “horror stories” about fetal alcohol syndrome and various other nightmares. She said that the measuring tape was for gauging the size of the craniums of her potential children, to “make sure there’s nothing wrong with them.”

The reason I think about this conversation so much these days is because I am finding—more and more often—that one of the primary obstacles for Christians in advocating for the fatherless can be summed up right there in that measuring tape: the issue of fear. As much as we might not want to admit it, many of us don’t think much about orphans because, frankly, we’re scared of them.

He continues...

Right now, there is a crisis of fatherlessness all around the world. Chances are, in your community, the foster care system is bulging with children, moving from home to home to home, with no rootedness or permanence in sight. Right now, as you read this, children are “aging out” of orphanages around the world. Many of them will spiral downward into the hopelessness of drug addiction, prostitution, or suicide. Children in the Third World are languishing in group-homes, because both parents have died from disease or have been slaughtered in war. The curse is afoot, and it leaves orphans in its wake.

Not every Christian is called to adopt or to foster children. And not every family is equipped to serve every possible scenario of special needs that come along with particular children. Orphan care isn’t easy. Families who care for the least of these must count the cost, and be willing to offer up whatever sacrifice is needed to carry through with their commitments to the children who enter into their lives.

But, while not all of us are called to adopt, the Christian Scriptures tell us that all of us are called to care “widows and orphans in their distress” (Jas. 1:27). All of us are to be conformed to the mission of our Father God, a mission that includes justice for the fatherless (Exod. 22:22; Deut. 10:18; Ps. 10:18; Prov. 23:10-11; Isa. 1:17; Jer. 7:6; Zech. 7:10). As we are conformed to the image of Christ, we share with him his welcoming of the oppressed, the abandoned, the marginalized; we recognize his face in the “least of these,” his little brother and sisters (Matt. 25:40).

Read the rest.

My two cents:

I have experienced this fear in our adoption of Mya.  Irrational thoughts can easily creep in and haunt parents of children adopted from different biological genes.  Much could be said in response to this fear, but I am usually arrested by one simply question, "What is the alternative?  That they rot away in a third world orphanages or cycle through the American foster care system?"  That is no alternative.  I preach to myself that God always provides the resources for his people to do what he has called them to do.

There is something to say though for a robust theology of suffering to be married to a robust theology of adoption.  I fear that if we don't work to have these concepts as parallel strains we'll set ourselves up for disillusionment and pain.  For most people, adoption is not sexy.  It is not easy and it is not "fun".  What part of the Christian life is those things?  But obedience always leads to blessing and the Cross always leads to a resurrection but these realities might not be fully realized even in this life.  We long for the One who will come and make all things right.

So let's proceed in faith as God's people on God's mission to declare and demonstrate the truth of his word to those who are most needy and broken among us.  It won't be easy and our fears will always tempt us to despair but an onlooking world needs to see radical generosity and God is pleased when we display the reality of our adoption to those who most need it.

Meditating on These Points Could Change Your Life

Justin Taylor:

“The fear of man lays a snare,
but whoever trusts in the LORD is safe.”
Proverbs 29:25

“Fear of man is such a part of our human fabric that we should check for pulse if someone denies it.”

—Ed Welch, When People Are Big and God Is Small.

In order to fear God not man, here are the steps Welch sets forth in his book:

Step 1: Recognize that the fear of man is a major theme both in the Bible and in your own life.

Step 2: Identify where your fear of man has been intensified by people in your past.

Step 3: Identify where your fear of man has been intensified by the assumptions of the world.

Step 4: Understand and grow in the fear of the Lord. The person who fears God will fear nothing else.

Step 5: Examine where your desires have been too big. When we fear people, people are big, our desires are even bigger, and God is small.

Step 6: Rejoice that God has covered your shame, protected you from danger, and accepted you. He has filled you with love.

Step 7: Need other people less, love other people more. Out of obedience to Christ, and as a response to his love toward you, pursue others in love.

You can read chapter 1 of the book online for free.

Rivendell and the Power of the Gospel

Guest Post by Dan Cruver

One of my favorite scenes in The Fellowship of the Ring (the book, not the movie) takes place in the land of Rivendell after Hobbits Frodo and Sam almost lost their lives at the hands of those seeking to capture the ring of power and before they continued their dangerous journey to the fires of Mount Doom in order to destroy the ring. J.R.R. Tolkien writes:

Such was the virtue of the land of Rivendell that soon all fear and anxiety was lifted from their minds. The future, good or ill, was not forgotten, but ceased to have any power over the present. Health and hope grew strong in them, and they were content with each good day as it came, taking pleasure in every meal, and in every word and song (287).

The good news of the life, death, and resurrection of Christ is of such a quality that the past, present, or imagined future, “good or ill, are not forgotten, but cease to have any power over the present.” We could write pages of application on this. If we are prone to worry about tomorrow, we need the gospel. If we tend to fear people or circumstances, we need the gospel. If we are paralyzed by regret or plagued by guilt, we need the gospel. Only the gospel can free us from these things.

Whose Approval?

D.A. Carson:

Would it be unduly cynical of me to suggest that most of us are more likely to feel troubled by something we have said or done that has upset a colleague or parishioner than by something that has dishonored God? Some do not want to be too closely associated with anything the scholarly guild judges old-fashioned or fundamentalist: that, surely, would be shameful. On the other hand, Jesus says some blunt things about those who are ashamed of him and his words (Mark 8:38). The question resolves into something pretty straightforward: Whose approval do we most earnestly desire? Whose approval do we want when we prepare for a lecture (whether to deliver it or to learn from it)? Whose approval do we seek when we preach a sermon? Whose approval matters most when we write a paper or slog away at a dissertation? Whose approval do we hunger for when we choose a vocation, decide how to use our time, take pains to build links of affection and accountability in the local church, exercise, bring up our children, nurture our families, read, lead a Bible study, help a neighbor?

(Editorial, Themelios, Nov. 2009)

Read the rest.

(HT: Mike Pohlman)

Fear of Failure

Craig Groeschel:

The fear of failure paralyzes too many people.

I’ve found one of the best gifts God can give a leader is the gift of failure.

Too many of us are not doing what we feel called to do because we’re afraid to fail.

As I observe the people around me, it seems the most effective have failed far more times than the least effective.

The people making the biggest impact seem to:

1) Try something outlandish.

2) Fail.

3) Learn.

4) Adjust.

5) Try something that works better.

Failure is never final. It is often the first step to success.

If you haven’t failed in awhile, why don’t you try something crazy and see what happens.