Doug Wolter:
...I was so intrigued when I came across a book called, Death by Suburb: How to Keep the Suburbs from Killing Your Soul. The title grabbed me. And so I bought the book. I’m only on the third chapter so far, but a few quotes have already hit home. Here’s one:A friend with a special needs child (and five other kids as well) recently said to me that he thought one spiritual issue of our community (which has a median household income of $75,000 — about the same as my community!) is how hard we work at appearing not to have any issues.
The sad thing, he says, is that you wind up with a bunch of folks who appear to have it all, but are miserable. They’re trapped in the attractive veneer of being ‘perfect people.’ That, by its very nature, negates the transparency to form a deeper bond with a human being.
Wow. I resonate with that big time. If you’re like me you want people to think you’re a great father with obedient kids; a loving husband who cherishes his wife; and a respected pastor who leads well. It’s like this built in pressure to perform (and get your kids to perform) so that others would think more highly of you. But in reality, I fail. I need help. And so do you. It doesn’t matter how much money we make, what position we hold, or how many A’s our kids get on their report cards, we’re all in need of grace. And so we need to cultivate environments of grace where we can be transparent with each other and admit our struggles. In doing so we will begin to put to death the greatest barrier to doing life together, namely, pride. Indeed, if pride can be put to death, by cross-centered community and humility, than perhaps life can exist even in the suburbs.
3 comments:
So, does he mean that we should blab about all our personal problems to our Christian Brothers and Sisters? That seems weird to me. I mean, there are a few, close personal friends with whom I would share some of that stuff, but I surely don't want everyone knowing my beeswax. I'm sure they'd get sick of hearing about it anyway. I'd like to think that you'd only share some of these struggles in the "can you pray with me" kind of way. I know people like to vent about their troubles and the line of gossip and complaining gets blurred with being a "prayer request".
On the other hand, I think we need to be aware of who, in our body, needs help (death in the family, financial difficulties, baby born, lost job, etc.) and be there to step up and take care of a need.
I guess I'd have to read the book to get what they're really trying to say.
I would say his intent is to push on the autonomous standard that most of us have. Basically, we just don't know anyone. I would say there is probably some rooms between "blabing about all our personal problems" and seeking to get to know our neighbors and loving them in tangible ways.
z
Tru dat.
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