I have yet to meet a couple locked in hostility (and the accompanying fear, self-pity, hurt, self-righteousness) who really understood and reckoned with their motives. James 4:1–3 teaches that cravings underlie conflicts. Why do you fight? It’s not “because of my wife/husband…”—it’s because of something about you. Couples who see what rules them—cravings for affection, attention, power, vindication, control, comfort, a hassle-free life—can repent and find God’s grace made real to them, and then learn how to make peace.- David Powlison, Seeing with New Eyes (P&R, 2003), p. 151.
(HT: C.J. Mahaney)
2 comments:
This looks like a good book. Once I realized as a husband that to lead spiritually was more about my sanctification instead of trying to somehow foster my wife's sanctification (fixing her or fixing things for her) our marriage got that much better!
The past is prophetic in that it asserts loudly that wars are poor chisels for carving out peaceful tomorrows.
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