…if you teach your child to obey and to perform for approval from you and from others, you present an unbiblical objective….People will respond well to a child who obeys, but you cannot make that secondary benefit of obedience the primary reason for obeying.
Superficial parenting that never addresses the heart biblically produces superficial children who do not understand what makes them tick. They must be trained to understand and interpret their behavior in terms of heart motivation.
The focal point is the heart of the child that is called to submission to God’s authority. The goal of correction is not simply to modify behavior, but to bring the child to sweet, harmonious, and humble heart submission to God’s will that he obey Mom and Dad. The heart is the battleground.
The power and grace of the gospel is most deeply understood, not by those who never face their biblical duties, but by those who do.
There is only one obedient response…If you accept any other response, you are training your children to disobey.
Respectful teenagers are developed when they are 1, 2, 3, 4, or 5…
Seeking forgiveness is not saying, “I am sorry that I got mad at you and yelled, but when you do that…” Seeking forgiveness is saying, “I am sorry. I sinned against you. I was mad. I threw a temper fit. There is no justification for behavior like that. Please forgive me. When you give reasons for your sin, you are not asking forgiveness, you are simply justifying your sin.Shepherding a Child's Heart
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