- How can Christians decide what they should and should not do sexually?
- What are some good books on marriage and sex?
- Why does God give young men such strong sexual desires?
- How far can unmarried people go sexually?
- What are some non-sexual ways to build marital intimacy?
- What are some of the freedoms the Bible gives for married lovemaking?
- How often should a married couple make love?
- What should we do if one of us does not feel in the mood for sex?
8 comments:
On question 3, I don't think that the answer is always so clear as Mark Driscoll implies. For example, why does God give so many mentally or physically disabled men strong sexual desire, when for some of them (not me, I hope!), finding a job that will allow them to support a wife and family is next to impossible?
I would *love* to get a good *Biblical* answer to this question, as I seek to be financially able to marry and care for a wife and family, when the right woman comes into my life, Lord willing!
Golly Zach, I didn't "think" I said anything that offensive, did I? I was seriously telling Chris I empathized with his situation, which I am aware of, and that I'd pray for that. And I was actually serious about the first question - with exception to the obvious Friday night humor invoked after that.
John C,
I obviously don't know what you wrote, so I can't say if it was truly offensive or not, but this is some information about my situation (some of which Zach knows about but you may not) that may be helpful for you.
I have a physical disability. I use a wheelchair to get around much of the time. I'm not paralyzed-- I have a milder form of Cerebral Palsy and cannot walk without assistance (i.e. crutches). Even on crutches, I cannot walk great lengths without experiencing great pain. I'm not able to drive, because my reflexes don't have the "split-second" timing that one needs to be able to drive safely. Therefore, I can't perform any job that involves driving. Obviously, I can't perform any job that would involve heavy lifting or other serious manual labor. I also can only type about 30 words a minute, due to very slight spasticity in my fingers (part of the CP). This rules out many secretarial or other office jobs (at least until I can get the kind of advanced computer equipment that will "type out" words as I speak them-- which is one thing that I *can* do very well, praise God!).
These factors have played into my struggling to simply get back and forth *to* a job. They have also reduced, somewhat, the number of jobs that I am *able* to do. Yet, I have same emotional and physical longings as any Christian man (who does not have the gift of celibacy, that is!) and strongly desire to be married to a Christian woman who loves the Lord as I do.
I am still working toward the job and the financial status that would allow me to provide for a wife and family. Lord willing, I will get there, and hopefully, sooner rather than later! :-) That's some of the "context" for this conversation for me.
Left out a word there-- *the* same emotional and physical longings as any Christian man... hey, where's my editing/proofreading job? :-)
Oh, and John, thank you seriously for the prayers, brother. I do deeply appreciate them.
If you give someone a rule, you may keep them on track for a day or two, but if you teach them to think Christianly you’ll help them to go on making the right decisions on their own. -Nt. Wright.
When I read posts like Christopher's I wince at the the thought that there are so many people that get caught in the crossfire of our attempts to "tell" people what to believe and how to live.
I know as a pastor that there have been so many sincere attempts to help people or goad people to live righteously that end up putting a heavy burden on the shoulders of sincere people that shouldn't be there.
Like a convo I had with a brother who lost his wife in a battle with cancer...we were disussing a situation about masturbation and porn issues that some people in my church were struggling with. In the conversation he simply asked what a man like him was supposed to do after 15 years of marriage and being a father and having his lover gone?
In that moment I felt like the car was thrown in reverse...yah, what is he to do?
Somethings sounds so "right" but for many...they may or may not be. I'm not talking the biggies, so dont go all fundamental on me...I'm just talking about some of this side stuff.
I just pray I will reflect God's heart, grace, will and not some hard and fast law that ends up making one these innocent ones stumble and miss the grace of God in their situations.
Thanks for sensitizing this pastor Christopher...I pray God blesses your journey with a wife that can love and care for you and that you can love and care for as well.
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