Event Church?

Shaun Groves has a great post on his blog called "DISMANTLING EVENT CHURCH". It is very similar to Mark Driscoll's comments here (part 1) and here (part 2).

**Editor's Note**: I really appreciate Mark's comments, but I don't think it is completely generous in terms of the black and white picture that he paints between "Seeker" and "Missional". I think there is a wide diversity of churches that blend these values in different ways leaning towards one side or another. I know that he is trying to paint a general picture, but I just wish I would have heard him speak of this distinction a bit since I'm sure that he is aware of it.

Is over-eating a sin?

Not sure how to answer that one, but Anthony Bradley has a great post dealing with the issue of obesity and weight loss.

The Office

If you go to the official website for The Office they have a media player where you can watch amazing outtakes and deleted scenes, etc. It's pretty funny.

Word on the street is that they are adding two new characters to the show.

This guy...



and this guy...



from "Whose Line is it Anyway" and "The Daily Show" for season three of the THE OFFICE.

Can you wear sandals when you lead worship?

Recently I was engaged in a converasation with a friend about appropriate dress attire when leading worship. Specifically, my friend was concerned about my wearing sandals when I was upfront leading. It was a good conversation...I'll spare you the details, but our conversation did raise some good questions concerning how we do church.

Bob Kauflin in his Worship Matters blog deals with this issue here. I believe he gives some sage advice.

The Lord's Supper: Some History

Super worship pastor, Scooter Sterner, has a great post giving some answers to questions regarding the history of this sacrement.

Internet Monk on the Christian Blogsphere

Interesting comments:

Nothing is more amusing than the intersection of a blog that values humor and wit with a blog that has no sense of humor at all. When you are talking about the Christian blogosphere, that generally results in someone being proclaimed as the “Spirit of the AntiChrist.” Like, let’s say, me, for example. I feel sorry for Christians who equate reverence with a complete inability to laugh or see the self-depricating aspects of all our theologizing. The somber, self-righteous tones of some Christian communicators doesn’t tell me that they are mature. It tells me that they have so little insight into the truth about themselves and others that they have to arrange a morbid house of cards and then condemn anyone who sneezes.

Sinister fairytale-world-gone-wrong

Interesting review of Keane's new record from Relevant Magazine.

Why I could never be Catholic

In my humble opinion, there are many theological reasons for not embracing the Catholic worldview. I won't bore you with those...

Theological reasons aside, this seems to be the most problematic for me at this point...

**Update** - the link works now... sorry about that

Review of Driscoll

Here is a great review of Mark Driscoll's, "Confessions of a Reformission Rev: Hard Lessons From a Emerging Missional Church". I have not read the book, but have read many reviews. I thought this one was very informative and insightful.

The Nativity Story

Here is a teaser trailer for The Nativity Story coming out in Dec of 2006.

Return to the Monastery!!

Shaun Groves, on his very interesting blog entitled, SHLOG, (sounds naughty, don't you think? He has responded to that charge here) asks some interesting questions concerning spiritual formation.

From Relevant Mag Blog:

A power outage in Los Angeles knocked out MySpace.com at several points over the weekend. Thousands of social lives suffered from the event, leaving many high-school and college students with no idea how to contact their friends, spend several unscheduled hours and function normally in society.

The Bluth Family

Recently a friend pointed me to this amazing site for all you Arrested Development fans. It's www.thebluthfamily.com. Pretty amazing. They have tons of your favorite quotes and pictures from each character. I could literally waste hours of time on this site...Oh wait... I almost forgot, I won't be able to since I already do that with this blog.

New Releases in CCM that will rock you

Here is a great article from one of the editors of CCM magazine detailing three soon to be released records that he believes have "the wow factor". Based on his writing and what I know of all three artists I am definately excited to hear all three. Check it out.

Music Monday - John Scofield - A Go Go

Jazz guitarist, John Scofield has long been known as a pioneer of sound and song in the jazz world for the past couple of decades. Of all his records that I have been exposed to, his collaboration with Medeski, Martin, and Wood on this record stands out to me as one of the best. It is atypical of what most would consider jazz, with its simple harmonic structures and very funk oriented grooves.

Here is a description from allmusic.com:

John Scofield owes a great deal to Medeski, Martin & Wood for the success of A Go Go. The piano/organ, bass, and drum playing trio adds a world of bouncing vibes to Scofield's inquisitive, happy guitar work here. A Go Go is an album of mostly breezy, sometimes tense, jam-based grooves. The album's charm is in its "city meets the tropics" feel. The four players create such a warm, vibrant sound that resisting the urge to tap one's feet along with the beat becomes a near impossibility. The opening song is a treat of plucked guitars and tightly packed new jazz. Other standouts are "Kubrick," a swooning, gentle change of pace packed with background tension, and "Hottentot," a tour de force of dynamic interplay. There's nary a moment of filler to be found across the ten tracks. It's clear that Scofield enjoyed the collaboration, as his guitars seem to nearly speak joy. His alternately jangling and plucking style sees him weaving in and out of the young trio's sound net with ample confidence. As fun as A Go Go is, it's just as well-sequenced, as Scofield and company vary their pace and tone expertly throughout the album's running time. A Go Go is far more than four cool cats jamming together and enjoying each other's company. It's an immensely entertaining, enlightening ride

Here is the iTunes link. Check it out!

Reformed Dorks Unite!!!

These shirts (and other questionable material) might not be as bad and the usual stuff that I see at Christian music festivals, but they come close. I'm sure they will be the normative dress at Piper's national conference in September.

I guess I did kinda like the Reformed thong though... (yes it's for real) I'm sure that Luther would have been down with this this little number. Knox, maybe. Calvin and Zwingli would have been staunchly opposed.

**Update** Editors note - Just so you are not confused, I didn't search the internet for a dumb thong that said "simply irresistable" on it. It's actually on the above page in case you didnt' see it.

Who sits around and comes up with these things?

My friend Justin begged me to link to his John Owen website. I guess i will oblige him just this once. Here it is...

(BTW - if you don't know who John Owen is yet you can read about him here. Basically, he is the Jonathan Edwards of 17th century England.)

Some Christian Satire

These are rather clever from Matt Ward:

Foxe's Book of AMERICAN Martyrs

The Purpose Driven Word of God

The Bluths on the Big Screen

Rumors are flying about everyone's favorite show, Arrested Development, hitting the big screen.

Jesus Ain't My Homeboy

Joe Carter at Evangelical Outpost has a great article about the infamous "Jesus is my homeboy" t-shirts.

Although Jesus is not my homeboy, Martin Luther certainly is. Church History testifies to him getting down with some drinking, farting, throwing ink-well's at the devil and general crudeness. What's not to love about that? I need to get this T-shirt for sure.



(HT: JT, but I think he got his post from me anyway, so do I owe him a HT?)

Encouraging Your Weird Pastor

Here is an interesting post from The Bible Belt Blogger concerning stats complied by the Barna group to identify the social lives and personalities of pastors. Some of the stats are pretty interesting. Check it out here.

On a different but related note...

Once when I was listening to a sermon by one of my former seminary prof's, Dan Doriani he brought up an interesting point about encouraging your pastor. He reminded his audience that typically one of the primary jobs of the senior pastor is to bear the weight of all his people's burdens. For example, in one day he could easily hear about the marriage of some high profile members that is falling apart, one of the elder's sons is smoking weed, the children's pastor is having an affair with his assistant, and the church secretary is embezzling money.

For some pastors when the phone rings the default setting can be one of dread as he wonders what is going to fall apart next. He is always bracing himself for the worst. This may be a pessimistic picture of the church, but anyone who knows human nature and has worked in the church for more than 5 minutes knows that this type of thing is very typical.

Dr. Doriani's suggestion was that if things are going well in your life, pick up the phone and say something like this to your pastor: "Hey Pastor! Just wanted to call and let you know that my marriage is going great, we are more in love than we have ever been. The kids are respectful and humble and learning what it means to love Jesus and the Gospel. We are finding a ton of joy in leading our small group and are seeing a lot of growth in the people we lead. Our finances are in order and we are giving more now than we ever have in our lives. Life is good!! Just wanted you to know! Have a great day. Goodbye"

I know this might sound a bit weird, but I'm sure that if you called your pastor and said something like this to him it would blow him away, and also serve to encourage him that God is showing much grace to his people. When he is called to bear the heavy burdens, your phone call may serve to "balance the scales" and help him fight the discouragement that can easily creep into his mind. Our pastors are not supermen and they need our encouragment just as much as we need theirs. Don't be afraid to let your pastor know that life is good!

The Prestige

This looks like a cool new movie: The Prestige. It's directed by Christopher Nolan (Memento, Batman Begins) and stars Hugh Jackman and Christian Bale. Here is the plot summary:

Bale and Jackman will play rival magicians in turn-of-the-century London who battle each other for trade secrets. The rivalry is so intense that it turns them into murderers. The title refers to the product of a successful trick.

Seven Tips for Fighting Internet Porn

Joshua Harris is starting a new series on his blog concerning fighting internet porn. You can read the first installment here.

The Fray

Interesting article by USA today about up and coming band, The Fray. Word is that they are Christians but are signed to a mainstream label. From the article:

Faith continues to be an important factor for the members of the Fray, who "grew up middle-of-the-road Protestant," Slade says. But "we don't call ourselves a Christian band. Because when you get into marketing, 'Christian' means that you have everything together, and you're always happy, and you want everybody to start going to your church. The common denominators in the music I've liked is the honesty of not having answers and the passion to find them. I think that's what spiritual music has, whether it's Christian or pop or new age. If we have an agenda, it's to make art that is honest and represents what we believe in." (my emphasis)

"Because when you get into marketing, 'Christian' means that you have everything together, and you're always happy, and you want everybody to start going to your church" - it's too bad that he feels this way, but in a lot of ways I think he is right. Sad, but true.

BTW: In my opinion, their song Over my Head (Cable Car) is one of the best of 2006. Here is the iTunes link.

**UPDATE**: Here is a link to an article from Christianity Today.
(HT: Relevant Mag)

The Intolerance of Tolerance

Great article by Greg Koukl on the way over used word "tolerance".

For all you joggers

Mac.com has this funky new invention.

Youth as the Significant Market Product

Carl Truemann, on Reformation 21 has a great article concerning the reality of aging and our culture's desire to glorify youth. In it he says:

Consumerism is often criticized for the way in which it exalts individual choice at the expense of all else, with the result that value becomes simply a function of the marketplace. Yet I would argue that it is not only the fact that consumerism has led to an exaltation of choices in themselves which makes it responsible for the reductionist notion of value; it is the fact that consumerism has actually made the wrong choice. In its identification of youth as the significant market product, it has backed immaturity over age, foolishness over wisdom, know-it-all arrogance over humble acknowledgment of limitations and mortality. And those societies – be they economic states or even local churches – which choose to build themselves on consumerism need to realize sooner rather than later that the easy-credit and self-centredness which lie at the heart of their philosophical project can only manifest themselves in childishness. Childish rhetoric, childish ambitions, childish achievements.

Read the whole thing here.

Reformed Praise

For some new arrangements to old hymns you may want to consider Reformed Praise. Seems like a very interesting site. I hunted around for a bit and I think my favorite new music/old lyrics arrangement was, O the Deep Deep Love of Jesus. What is great about this site is that you can access a lot of their material for free. Thanks guys!

The Lord's Supper Every Week?

Josh Malone at First Theology asks some important questions about our current Protestant forms of worship and specifically why it is that we don't partake of the Lord's supper every week in our services.

How Much is Your Home Worth?

Check out this new site from yahoo.com. Pretty cool. Since we are selling our home right now, the number we got was a bit depressing.

American Idol Wannabes

Anyone tired of the American Idol Wannabes? Holy Cow!!! I just checked the listings to see what was on tonight. Here are my options as a non-cable TV subscriber:

ABC: The One: Making a Music Star

NBC: America's Got Talent

CBS: Rock Star: Supernova

FOX: So You Think You Can Dance


Thanks, but no thanks. How about try some creativity when it comes to programming?

Netflix and the problem of media oversaturation

I am a huge fan of Netflix - however this amazing new internet invention does pose certain problems. These articles speak to them...

From this article:

The digital revolution has introduced us all to the life-altering phenomenon known as asynchronous entertainment. We can now enjoy movies, TV shows and our favorite media sources wherever, whenever, we want. But a decade into this monumental shift, the drawbacks are coming into focus. Episodes of “The Daily Show” and “Letterman” pile onto our DVR television recorders like copies of The New Yorker, begging to either be consumed or wastefully discarded. Netflix movies line up on our shelves like airplanes on a runway waiting to take off. And all of those blog postings relentlessly flood into our Web browsers every hour, every day. There’s certainly not time for all of it. Is this entertainment? It feels more like homework.

From this article:

"It's a paradox of abundance," said Siva Vaidhyanathan, a professor of culture and communication at New York University. If people aren't pressured to see a movie in a specific time frame, he said, viewers tend to put it lower on their priority list. "When you have every choice in front of you, you have less urgency about any particular choice," he added.

(HT: Think Christian)

Andrew Osenga

Here is an interesting interview with Andrew Osenga.

Andrew Osenga has done more in the last decade than any working musician should expect. As a small-town teenager, he gained a cult following as the frontman for The Normals, only to see the band fall apart within a matter of years. He recorded a critically acclaimed solo album with hardly any budget to speak of. He took a job with another band with a devoted following—Caedmon’s Call—and ended up filling the empty slot left by Derek Webb’s departure from the band. Now entrenched as the lead guitarist and songwriter for Caedmon’s, Osenga is stepping out once again with a solo album. The Morning, released under the Square Peg Alliance brand, comes out this week.

I have the priviledge of writing with this Andrew next week. Hopefully we'll write a massive hit that will pay for my son's college.

The Plagues of the OT on the Big Screen

Here is a wild trailer for Hillary Swank's new movie coming out in November. Here is the plot summary from imdb.com:

Hilary Swank plays a former Christian missionary who lost her faith after her family was tragically killed, and has since become a world-renowned expert in disproving religious phenomena. But when she investigates a small Louisiana town that is suffering from what appear to be the Biblical plagues, she realizes that science cannot explain what is happening and she must regain her faith to combat dark forces threatening the community.

Hollywood has finally figured out that if they market to Christians, they will make tons of money. I'm sure this is partly the motivation behind producing this movie but frankly I don't really care what their motivation is as long as they put out great movies. I have no idea if this film has any Biblical grounding other than the idea of the 10 plagues, but nonetheless it looks pretty entertaining.

Preacher in the clubs

Rob Bell rocks the club scene. Interesting idea reported on by the NYTimes.com

How to Fix CCM

Here is a great article dealing with some of the issues that I raise on this blog. In it the author says:

"Think of it this way: Would a plumber advertise himself as a "Christian plumber" if he wanted to serve both believers and non-believers? Perhaps, but then, many non-Christians with clogged toilets might not hire him because of that designation. But if he simply presents himself as a "plumber"—still intending to do a great job and prepared to discuss his faith with any interested clients—he's likely to get more business, earn a better living, and interact with more non-believers."

"Imagine what would happen if Christian-oriented labels announced that they would change the way they do business—that for the artists who wanted to reach the mainstream, the labels would stop marketing them as "Christian music," and instead develop and market artists who write songs that reference their faith to fellow believers, as well as to millions of Americans who may not share their faith but like their music."

My prediction - Music as we know it today with stark distinctions between Christian labels and non-Christian ones will probably only be around for another 5-10 years. The model of Christian musicians operating in the mainstream is where we will be headed in the next generation.

Credit cards are for stupid people

Preying on human nature's need for instant gratification, credit companies make billions of dollars every year. This story points to some scary stats when it comes to credit cards and college students.

Dave Ramsey has a good word about this here.

Music Monday - Taylor Sorensen

Yet another music Monday post about a "Christian" artist who never should have been allowed to start a career in "Christian" music. This music is way to "cool" and niche oriented. Today I would like to draw your attention to Taylor Sorensen. I think along with Jason Morant, MuteMath (though they despise the Christian label), Phil Wickam, and a few others, Taylor is one of the freshest things to come out of "Christian" music. Unfortunately due to the small market share of "Christian" music, these guys don't sell many records. This record was released a few years back and I hear that he has new one slated to come out soon. It's definitely worth the purchase.

Here is his national debut.

Here is a breakdown of the songs and album description.

Luther is my Homeboy

I guess since I was raised Lutheran I should get one of these shirts for myself.

The Rise and Fall of the Hit

Great new article from wired.com concerning new trends in our consumption of entertainment. Here is an excerpt:

Music itself hasn’t gone out of favor – just the opposite. There has never been a better time to be an artist or a fan, and there has never been more music made or listened to. But the traditional model of marketing and selling music no longer works. The big players in the distribution system – major record labels, retail giants – depend on huge, platinum hits. These days, though, there are not nearly enough of those to support the industry in the style to which it has become accustomed. We are witnessing the end of an era.

(HT: SHLOG)

New John Mayer Single

John Mayer has a new single. You can check it out here on iTunes. Daddy likey.

More Church Marquees

In keeping with an earlier post, check out this site.

Social Isolation

Here in an interesting article from the Washington Post about the growing feeling of relational isolation in America. Seems not that hard to figure out with the rise of email, instant messenging, myspace (i mean pornspace).com, and other sites like it.

As one who loves his laptop like a third child, it seems to me that in our current technological age we needs to be very careful not to bow to the ease of surfacy relationships and fight for real Biblical community. Are we a sea of people with hundreds of myspace.com friends and an email address book that is full, but no one to go to in the deepest times of need?

Cosmic Child Abuse?

As a college student I was a religion major. My favorite professor, Jerry Soneson was a brilliant educator, tirelessly working to help his students succeed. Along with this he was a staunch agnostic and loved to assault the naive and simplistic Christian assumptions of his impressionable young college students. For sure this time in my life served to solidfy my beliefs as they were challenged in new ways.

One of Dr. Soneson's primary objections to the historic, orthodox gospel was that to him it was "cosmic child abuse". He broke it down to me like this: What sense does it make for God to be (his words) pissed off at his people, but then instead of punish them he goes and kicks around his Son to somehow pacify his fury. Isn't this classic misplaced aggression? Where is the justice in this? Where is the love in this? It was utterly nonsensical to him. Unfortunately, at the time I did not have a good response to his objection.

In my current reading of John Stott's, The Cross of Christ, this long, (but well worth the read) quote served to help me formulate a response his objection.

We begin by showing that God must 'satisfy himself', responding to the realities of human rebellion in a way that is perfectly consonant with his character. This internal necessity is our fixed starting-point. In consequence, it would be impossible for us sinner to remain eternally the sole object of his holy love, since he cannot both punish and pardon us at the same time. Hence the second necessity, namely substitution. The only way for God's holy love to be satisfied is for his holiness to be directed in judgment upon his appointed substitute, in order that his love may be directed towards us in forgiveness. The substitute bears the penalty, that we sinner may receive that pardon. Who then is the substitute? Certainly not Christ, if he is seen as a third party. Any notion of penal substitution in which three independent actors play a role - the guilty party, the punitive judge and the innocent victim - is to be repudiated with the utmost vehemence. It would not only be unjust in itself but would also reflect a defective Christology. For Christ is not an independent third person, but the eternal Son of the Father, who is one with the Father in his essential being.

What we see, then, in the drama of the cross is not three actors but two, ourselves on the one hand and God on the other. Not God as he is in himself (the Father), but God nevertheless, God made-man-in-Christ (the Son).

...For in giving his Son he was giving himself. This being so, it is the Judge himself who in holy love assumed the role of the innocent victim, for in and through the person of his Son he himself bore the penalty which he himself inflicted. As Dale put it, 'the mysterious unity of the Father and the Son rendered it possible for God at once to endure and to inflict penal suffering'. There is neither harsh injustice nor unprincipled love nor Christological heresy in that; there is only unfathomable mercy. For in order to save us in such a way as to satisfy himself, God through Christ substituted himself for us. Divine love triumphed over divine wrath by divine self-sacrifice. The cross was an act simultaneously of punishment and amnesty, severity and grace, justice and mercy.

Seen thus, the objections to a substitutionary atonement evaporate. There is nothing even remotely immoral here, since the substitute for the law-breakers is none other than the divine Lawmaker himself.

Rick Warren and North Korea?

After I read "Eyes of the Tailless Animals" (please read this book if you have not already) I was pretty sure the best way to deal with North Korea (hyberbole warning) was to just nuke them and let them start over. The attrocities that this government commits it's people are unthinkable.

Here is an interesting article from Christianity Today about Rick Warren's planned trip over there and other things concerning the nation.

The Depth of our Pride

The proud human heart is there revealed. We insist on paying for what we have done. We cannot stand the humilitation of acknowleding our backruptcy and allowing someonbody else to pay for us. The notion that this somebody else should be God himself is just too much to take. We would rather perish than repent, rather lose ourselves than humble ourselves.

-John Stott, The Cross of Christ, p. 162

Bullhorn Guy

Here is a link to one of Rob Bell's Nooma videos, entitled "Bullhorn Guy". In sum, it is his plea to all those horrible street preachers, and college campus preachers, to stop screaming at people and calling them horrible names. For sure this needs to be said.

Rob needs to be commended. He is a great example of someone who is making short films that seem to be a step above the norm for "Christian" art. It is very high quality. I would not have a problem showing this to any of my unbelieving friends. It's great.

I agree with alot of what Rob says, but it seems that there are some holes in his Biblical reasoning, or at least there are some things that need further clarification. I would love to read your thoughts on the video after you watch it. (WMA)

The guys at Reformed Evangelist blog have posted their take here. I can resonate with some of what the author is saying, but I fear that the tone in the writing may feed the common stereo-type that Calvinists are a bit ungracious in their critiques of someone else's differing view.

More of the Finest in Christian Culture

A marquee near my house reads, "Forbidden fruits can create jams".

Frequently, in my dreams, this happens to me...

Scooter has a very funny worship leader sound byte here.

iTunes for Preachers

Here is an interesting site. Tons of mp3 sermons avaliable for a small fee. All you sermon junkies might want to check it out.

Humility in Worship

I have been reading John Stott's, The Cross of Christ, lately. I read much of it in college and it's a book that I'm sure I will reread over the course of my life. I came across this sobering quote last night:

In public worship our habit is to slouch or squat; we do not kneel nowadays, let alone prostrate ourselves in humility before God. It is more characteristic of us to clap our hands with joy than to blush with shame or tears. We saunter up to God to claim his patronage and friendship; it does not occur to us that he might send us away. We need to hear again the apostle Peter's sobering words; 'Since you calll on a Father who judges each man's work impartially, live your lives...in reverent fear.' In other words, if we dare to call our Judge our Father, we must beware of presuming on him. It must even be said that our evangelical emphasis on the atonement is dangerous if we come to it too quickly. We learn to appreciate the access to God which Christ has won for us only after we have first seen God's inaccessibility to sinners. We can cry 'Hallelujah' with authenticity only after have have first cried 'Woe is me, for I am lost'. In Dale's words, 'it is partly because sin does not provoke our own wrath, that we do not believe that sin provokes the wrath of God'.

- p. 109

In September, IVP is going to rerelease this book as the 20th anniversary edition. You can read about it here.

The Wounded Worshiper

Christianity Today recently posted a great interview with Michael Card.

Excerpts:

Twenty-five years of composing music, writing books, creating Bible study material and garnering awards haven't given Michael Card immunity from sorrow. After he watched his 18-year-old nephew and two infant nieces die, Card embarked on a journey to learn how grief brings us closer to God. His new album, The Hidden Face of God, follows his book, A Sacred Sorrow. Card shared with us about why both projects are devoted to the topic of grief, about the church in America and about true worship.


Job's friends blamed him for his suffering. Christians often tend to do the same thing to other Christians. Why is that?

Card: Other people's suffering is threatening to people because it goes against their formula where if you're good, God blesses you, and if you're bad, God punishes you. When people see others suffering, they can't understand it. They come up with easy answers because they feel threatened that it could happen to them. My sister and brother had people telling them if they just had enough faith, their children wouldn't have died.

How does someone "worship God with their wounds," like you sing in "Come Lift up Your Sorrows"?

Card: We can't worship God without recognizing our woundedness. We have a worship revolution going on in the U.S., but we're not worshiping. There is no woundedness in it. True worship celebrates God's worth, and without experiencing woundedness, you don't know his worth. You don't have that experience of God's presence over God's provision. You experience his worth in the wilderness, not in the picnic grounds. "Amazing Grace" says, "I once was lost, but now am found." Without that acknowledgment of loss, what do you have to worship him for, unless you're just worshiping feeling good? Lament is the lost language of worship.

Read the whole thing here.

Marital Conflict - Part 2 - The Power of Tears

In an earlier post I talked about how we discussed in our young marrieds small group the important issues of timing and tone as keys to navigating healthy marital conflict. Another issue that came up in our group as it pertains to marital conflict has to do with the typical differing of emotional levels between men and women.

If both partners are Christians there is the assumption that there will be humility present in both parties sufficient to navigate the words of adjustment that are often needed from one spouse to the other. Unfortunately this assumption is not shared by all. I had a mentor once tell me that when his wife came to him with an issue of character adjustment that he would attempt to listen carefully and ask the Lord to work in his heart to rectify the deficiency that his wife brought to light. He then went on to tell me that at times with women in general and specifically with his wife when the tables were turned it was not a pretty scene. He said she was far too emotional he to be able to handle the direct and open discussion of her need for adjustment as well. He basically said that women have to be held to a different standard.

I don’t buy it.

Granted, all women are different, but where in the Bible does is say that women are free from the humility that it takes to hear words of correction that both partners desperately need, just because they may be more emotional? For sure they are a “weaker vessel” (meaning more fragile) and as husbands we need to keep a careful watch over our tone of voice in these sorts of marital discussions, but being more emotional than the husband does not remove the need for honest communication concerning ones need for character or attitude adjustment.

The way that this can sometimes plays out in marriages is that the wife (unconsciously, or worse yet, consciously) can use tears as a means of shutting down the conversation. The man brings up an issue for the wife to consider, it hurts her feelings even though it needed to be said, she bursts into tears, the husband backs off and takes on a mindset of damage control, and does whatever it takes to makes his wife feel better. As a result the issue may never get dealt with and in the future they unknowingly slip into a reoccurring, unhealthy pattern of dealing with conflict which never allows them to get to the root of the issue. Unfortunately, for many couples this is a very familiar scene.

After about 4 years of marriage my wife and I went on a walk one night and we had a very frank discussion of this issue. I felt that we had many times found ourselves as actors in the scene described above. She agreed that at times we had fallen into that pattern and that this was a problem. She added something that was very helpful to me. She said that at time she is going to cry simply because she is a more emotional person, but her crying does not mean that she doesn’t hear what I am saying and take it seriously, it just means that she is responding emotionally and that I don’t need to shrink back or turn our focus away from the issue just because of her tears. This was very helpful for me to hear from her.

In the end, emotional or not, a commitment to mutual humility before each other is the only way to navigate marital conflict. Our sin nature testifies to us that this is much easier said than done. We have found that the best way to see selflessness manifest in our marriage is to daily sit at the foot of the cross. This posture is one of the greatest deterrents to the pride that will destroy our marriages.

Relevance doesn't exist

I remember when I was first starting out in ministry one my mentor's who also happened to be the senior pastor would frequently talk about having an "edge" in the worship service. This usually meant that we wanted to keep people on the edge of their seats, always wondering what was coming next. Basically, we needed to give them the feeling of being entertained. No one would ever admit to that; I think we were just naively unaware of the dangers of this approach.

Al Mohler speaks wisely to this issue in his post from the TG4 blog.

The other problem with the “cutting edge” is that it really has no edge. The culture is moving at warp speed in so many different directions that absolute relevance is a mirage. Faithfulness to the Gospel produces the only relevance that matters. Of course, we use forms of language and mechanisms of communication that others can understand, but the basic structure of our ministry and the substance of our beliefs are unchanged and unchanging – and still ever relevant.

I think that most would agree that this "warp speed" that he speaks of is primarily due to the Internet. For example, when my parents were growing up in the 60's there was basically one choice of music, The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, The Beach Boys, etc... These bands stayed around forever because there wasn't a means by which easy mass exposure to other forms of pop music could be found. Musical trends and preferences changed over the course of years, sometimes by decades. Today, with the rise of the internet musical trends and preferences can change literallly by the day. I don't really think that they do, but the potential is there.

This is why the pursuit of "relevance" in the church or in worship music (if that means a certain style) is a empty and futile pursuit. I would submit that what we need is more Christians who really know who they are and who they are called to be and then do that with an excellence that the world has to take note of. If we seek to be "relevant" for the sake of bringing attention to the gospel I think we need to forsake the pursuit of this concept, (because it doesn't exist) and embrace a doctrine of excellence and personal calling in all facets of life and ministry. This speaksmuch more relevantly to the culture around us than us trying to "make Jesus cool" by showing the world that we can use their forms but just infuse our theology into it.

The flip side of this coin is the issue of creativity. What is it's place in worship? Unfortunately, many churches that forsake the idea of "relevance" have lazy pastors who don't want to put the mental effort into presenting anything creative in their worship services for fear that they might be labeled, "seeker-sensitive" or "man-centered". Our God is creative! We need not go any farther than the first verse in the Bible to begin to have a doctrine of creativity for the church. The question is not whether we should be creative in our worship services, but rather, what is our motive for wanting it? I believe that when we seek to honor God with our creativity it glorifies him as the ultimate Creator and one result may be that people are drawn to Him through us.

In the end, forsake "relevance" as a concept and pursue Gospel-infused, creative excellence. I believe this may be one pathway to consistent authentic ministry in our churches and ministries.